The responsibility is only yours and yours alone

I started to distance myself completely from the so-called spiritual scene because its childish hypocrisy has repelled me. Although I like to use many spiritual terms, I cannot find myself in the understanding of the spirituality that I came across. People who reside in the spiritual scenes seem to believe that awakening to life in the here and now, or even the legendary enlightenment, is something that makes us all and immediately to a kind of angels or infallible authorities. Unfortunately, these people idealize both the spirituality and all those who have dedicated themselves to the path of self-knowledge and the deeper dimensions of life and report about it.

I also currently encourage everyone to be aware and know themselves because I am deeply committed to this awareness-work, as I call it, and I recognize that the origin of all suffering is based on our fragmentary view of life, on our almost exclusive dedication to the content of the mind. Recognizing obstacles to love and serenity, recognizing that life without psychological suffering is possible, does it mean that I never experience the obstacles and the psychological suffering being an authority on no-suffering? For God’s sake!… I wonder so often about human naivety that manifests itself in such conclusions.

People create authorities and follow them blindly in order to avoid responsibility for their own life. And when these imaginary authorities turn out to be just human, they insult and blame the same authorities.

When will people understand that there is no such thing as authority? That authority is a mental invention, an idea based on wishful thinking? Even in practical areas of life something like omniscient or better-knowing authority is controversial. But when it comes to life itself, when it comes to fundamental questions of life and what we are, there can be no illusion whatsoever that there is one who is omniscient, infallible and an authority. Really, if someone only accepts something like this as a possibility, it is pure madness.

That is why I find the spiritual scenes so repulsive, even if real spirituality itself is the greatest that I have discovered in this life story. There are even some, who create guru ratings and evaluations and then want to figure out their level of enlightenment based on the behavior and misconduct of those spiritual authorities. How laughable. It reminds me of how people wanted to measure the leadership qualities of a head of state in examining their private love stories.

Current, conditioned, petty bourgeois, social standards are then mostly used to assess the so-called authorities. This is the case in both spiritual and secular societies. And so some are worshiped, and if they do not act according to the petty bourgeois norms – they are attacked. A head of state must have no affairs, a spiritual teacher must not smoke, must never be angry, must not possess money, and preferably he/she should be sexless.

And so people judge based on what they can find out about these authorities.

Charismatic teachers like Mooji or Osho around which a cult emerges, are classified as dangerous and false, while Ramana Maharshi, whom little is known about, is worshipped. It is funny for me that also Jiddu Krishnamurti is worshipped so deeply, when he himself considered worship as dangerous and the origin of absolute stupidity. Another thing is that not many know that Krishnamurti had a longstanding, secret affair with his secretary and his own friend’s wife. If the spiritual hypocrites find out, Krishnamurti will quickly shrink in their admiration of him. It is so childish and yet many adults love to waste their time with such trifles.

They don’t understand that it doesn’t matter who I am, who Mooji is, who Krishnamurti is and who slept with whom. We are grown people, and we are all looking for the best way of life and the best understanding of life for us. Some tell you, listen to him or her. She is right. Do what she says. Do what your mother told you to do. Do what your wife tells you or your head of state.

And then the spiritual teachers, or I tell you: look inside yourself and find out for yourself. We have found that thinking is less important than exploring, seeing and being conscious. We claim that psychological suffering does not have to be, and that all answers can be found here and now, wherever you are.

As anybody else we too can and are free to claim what we have found out for ourselves. Believing us, agreeing with us is not enough. You have to find out for yourself if our suggestions attract you or not. You have to look for yourself whether they are true or false. If you want. We don’t care if you believe us or not. We don’t care if you follow us or not. Grow up, stop relaying on others and find out for yourself if you want. Or let it be. That’s all.

It is true both for me and for the spiritual teachers I know that, if you follow the path that we propose and suggest, your life will change decisively and that qualities such as serenity, openness, love, joy will come to the fore. But not as our conditioned mind imagines it. However, the changes do not mean that we are not human beings and stopped living out our humanity, or that we are never overwhelmed by the conditioned mind. This facts do not at all shake our loyalty to our claims. On the contrary, how else could we tell the difference between serenity, love and suffering? By looking inside of us.

People who know me well, have experienced me reacting angrily, unfairly, harmfully. They know that I can forget myself and live out the old possessive mechanisms of fear, even if only for a short time before the seeing arises. It is true that these mechanisms of mind no longer dominate my life, and that an absolutely extraordinary trigger is required, so that they can happen. Yet fragmentary thinking instead of holistic awareness can also gain dominance here, I can still get caught in assumptions and ideas, in assumptions and beliefs about myself and others. By “getting caught” I mean that these beliefs, ideas, imaginations let me act and react mechanistically according to them. And yet I alone can see how much mischief such moments of forgetfulness can do. That’s one of the reasons why I am writing and talking about it. So that you too can look and maybe see for yourself, how you become blind to the reality of life getting caught in the imaginary fragments of the mind-content. Maybe you too can see, how you make yourself unhappy and take responsibility for you happiness and unhappiness, rather then projecting it to other people and situations. This is the work of spiritual teachers: to show you the clouds of their and your own mind and the discovered possibility of living without them. There is no guarantee, it all depends on our commitment and the will to dive into this subject.

That’s why both arguing and seeking authorities on this subject is useless. It is your own way. You can see for yourself if that what I or another spiritual teacher suggest, can become your own discovery too.

There is nothing harmful in this access, and in our suggestions, unless you make it harmful through your blind beliefs in our words, through your blind following us as authorities and flawless idols, through your inability to take responsibility for your life. Unlike many who tell you what to do and how to do and what is wrong and right, this approach asks you to find out for yourself and either follow this way, or leave it. The responsibility is only yours and yours alone.